There is some ridiculous thunder going on right now. The weather in London has actually been surprisingly alright lately, but I would rather it be snowing. Snow is so baller. Makes everything look all clean and nice, until everyone wakes up and drives their cars and turns it into sludge but we shant focus on the negatives. Still pretty, still want it. I also really want to play sims, but I feel like in order to do that I need to find some really solid programming on tv to surrender all other use of my computer. That's a lot of responsibility. Anyway, I've been in London for what seems like bloody ages at this point, even though it's only been like six days, and as I've either gone out or had people over every day I decided to just chill today and show y'all a bit of the flat.

I am so obsessed with this tea, despite the fact that it's one of those disappointing ones that smells amazing and then tastes super watery. I have like five cups a day and there are only 3 teabags left which is stressing me out. The fact that it gets dark at like 4pm is still getting to me after over a month here, and since I've been in the flat it's been motivating me to actually get up in the morning and use the daytime so I don't have to live in darkness. Not today, today I slept til 1, but in general. I've been pondering my productivity lately, especially since MC and multiple subscribers have been enquiring as to when I'm actually going to make a new video, but there's just something about my anxiety stopping me and I can't really figure out why. Things on that front have been a bit up and down, but for the most part it's better at the moment than it used to be so it shouldn't be stopping me from doing anything, but I think I'm just so overly aware of and cautious about it coming back that I keep putting certain things off. Interesting. Should probs work on fixing that.


ATTENTION I HAVE FIGURED OUT HOW TO USE BBC IPLAYER ON THE TV AND HAVE THUS UNLOCKED A TREASURE TROVE OF DOCUMENTARIES OHHHHH SHOOT WHAT CURRENTLY STARTING "CLEOPATRA: PORTRAIT OF A KILLER" CAINT NO ONE STOP ME NOW


It is now Saturday. Patrick stayed over last night after we went to Jackson's and we watched Polar Express and The Grinch, during which he fell asleep several times. I thoroughly enjoyed it though, plus we got pizza and garlic bread and mozzarella sticks which did nothing but amplify my joy tenfold. Today we just hung out and finished the rest of the movies in my christmas folder (other than Eloise at Christmastime, saving that one for showtime), and now I'm working my way through the shows I've recorded so I can delete them from the TiVo, which feels very productive to me. Just like how the other day I cleared 60GB of space on my macbook (right!??), organised my external harddrive and then just sat there feeling super pleased with myself for a hour or so. Baby steps. PS just made some of that M&S chicken, bacon and corn chowder that I got the other day and dayum shawty.


In the time I've spent not writing this post I have composed my christmas list (we're doing belated christmas once I'm home). I haven't figured out what I want for my birthday yet and there isn't anything big I want so for once I've concentrated on the small stuff. Basic essentials such as books, candles and the 1D movie on dvd. Re: birthday presents, as I'm turning 21 this time I feel like I need to really take advantage of this milestone birthday since I don't get another one til I'm like 50, but I can't think of anything suitable to ask for and it is stressing me out. I'm leaning towards a really nice bag or a desktop mac but can not decide and the struggle is just marching on. I would like to automatically know how to drive without actually having to learn. That is a thing that I would like for my birthday.